Hardwood

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Hey babe, need an S-Rank? I'm your guy! Place an order here and I'll get to work on it ASAP.

FIRST ORDER - 3 PD
SECOND ORDER - 2 PD
THIRD ORDER - 1 PD

Up to five concurrent orders will be tracked here for completion on a first-come first-serve basis:
1 LINKER - ARREST MECHS - READY FOR PICKUP
2 AIZEN - HELL SHOT - READY FOR PICKUP
3 YUFFIE - DAIJI MECHS - READY FOR PICKUP
4 YUFFIE - SATANA SLICER - READY FOR PICKUP
5 YUFFIE - VALKYRIE TWIN

Here are the rules for submitting a request (please read carefully!):

Your order must include the name and type of your ES.
e.g. NINEINCH SABER, JELLEN SWORD

Only ES weapons from Episode 1 are available for custom order at this time.

Hardcore Mode S-Ranks are available upon request - however, payment must be made in the same amount of Normal Mode PDs.

Furthermore, depending on how many orders you have already placed for me in total, an additional task will be required of you:

FIRST ORDER - I need to confirm that you aren't a bot! Upload a screenshot of your character performing lobby action Alt+K (Alt+Shift+K for female characters!)

e.g.
2bbbb33054.png

SECOND ORDER - To show your sincerity, please write 100 words or more about your favorite HUmar, and why he is your favorite HUmar.

e.g.
I have always loved everything about HUmars, from their fashion to their prowess in Challenge Mode. However, for me there is one special HUmar. His name is champ. champ was born into a chaotic world rife with injustices. From the young age of seven, he knew that he was destined to be the one to set things right. You see, normally, men are unable to wield, let alone carry, heavy photon swords bigger than their own bodies. Due to restrictions imposed by the human brain, the average human is only able to use up to 40-50% of his strength; professional bodybuilders can use 60-65%.
So why is champ able to accomplish such a feat? Champ's body is special. The unique physiology of the champ allows him to unlock the massive reserves of strength stored within his body by triggering to surpass his mental limiters. Champ is powered almost exclusively by pictures of lewd anime girls. It is estimated that every picture he consumes increases his striking power by 10 ATP. After training underneath a waterfall and meditating for a long time, champ set out into the ruins of Pioneer 1 to accomplish feats of heroism with his newfound strength. Currently he aspires to victory in the finals of Koshien, where he will face off against his rival, Delsaber, in the ruins of Pioneer 1 Stadium. Champ will stop at nothing to take home the championship belt for his highschool. Watch out! Champ is coming for you.

THIRD ORDER - Nothing! By submitting a third order, you give consent to have your name immortalized in the following list of honorable players.

YUFFIE
LINKER
BRIONAC

Each buyer is restricted to a maximum of 3 custom S-Ranks from me.

You must submit payment after ordering and before delivery.

Requests will not be acknowledged if they fail to provide the requested information.

I reserve the right to deny requests, e.g. for lack of sincerity.
 
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Dang, this real? Alright. I'd order 3 at once but I mostly need E2 s-ranks and I don't wanna clutter your to-do list, so I'll start with one for now. I also don't know if I can stomach the thought of complimenting, I mean, composing a well thought out appreciative post of a dignified member of everybody's favorite class of hunter.

DULLAHAN MECHGUN

(In case you're on now I'm able to do payment ASAP)
 

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Order received cameron-, however the queue is full so I will have to add it in after I finish JC's ES.
 
DEMONS mechgun x 2 and HELL shot good sirorder
My humar confession will be in works until I receive first S-Rank. :)
 

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HELL SHOT
GALLIARD SLICER

...please.

1st payment - I went to the only appropriate lobby for Hardwood, of course.
pso132256490593624294.png

2nd payment:
My favourite HUmar is Hardwood. How often do you see a player that resilient on telling others about their sexuality? It's astounding. I even got invited to personally have intercourse with him at one point. That made me feel like one day, I might actually impress Kireek, which is my lifelong dream. Hahaha... rdwood. Not to mention that his HUmar looks fantastic, as well. Optimal looks go a long way. Where others have to rely on inferior classes like HUcaseal to complete Challenge Mode, Hardwood laughs and ALT Ks the monsters away with his hunter made of flesh and bones. And to the haters:

Hardwood isn't so great? Are you kidding me? When was the last time you saw a player with such an ability and movement with HUmar? Hardwood puts the game in another level, and we will be blessed if we ever see a player with his skill and passion for the game again. Roo breaks records. Ender breaks records. Hardwood breaks the rules. You can keep your optimal play. I prefer the I'm gay. > Everybody
 
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Second order will be DEMONS Mechguns but I only want you to fulfill this once you have completed first orders from others!

My favourite Humar has to athlete whom I met one sunny evening in the bright lobby 1 on a ship named Fodra. His first word will always resonate in my soul “Yes. > Eleina “. He then embraced me and took me on a journey through the depths of Ragol. He showed me a fire spitting beast, a rather large snake, an interesting electronic toy amongst other things...He showed his fortitude laying down the obstacles one by one, never relenting and never failing. The strongest humar I know and I’m sure he will come to the rescue of this ES weapon request. I know one day I’ll heed the call from my favourite humar athlete when he asks Would you like to play challenge mode?>Everybody
 
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